Sunday, April 29, 2012

What motivates me?


What motivates me? What keeps me going, what makes me focus on my passion, what makes me strive for more? To be more? What keeps me from the soul crushing routine of day to day life? What makes me want to learn about new things, or try new things?

Is it self-respect? Is it adrenalin? Is it the need to show other people? Is it a narcissistic desire to be the best, ever, at everything? Or is it because it brings me inner peace?

What juices up my life and what does it inspire me to do?

Victoria, a fellow writer and blogger, asked these questions recently on her blog, The Musings of a LesbianWriter. They made me think about my own motivations so I rewrote the questions, directing them towards myself.

With my passion for photography, my motivation has always been a deep desire to show others the beauty in this world. Since shifting my photography focus from landscape to people and street photography, I've noticed that my the fires of my passion have been stoked, so to speak. I'm not sure if it's about learning something new but I find myself almost obsessed over learning how to take better photographs of people. Photographs that tell a story or bring out someone's beauty is what fuels me and motivates me to pursue this art form.

With writing, I have this deep need to share my story. Perhaps it stems from the lesson and power of story sharing that I learned while in Alateen traveling around to “the big meetings” sharing my story with everyone. I was speaking in front of rooms of 50 to 100 people when I was 16 years-old. Sharing my very personal story of growing up with alcoholic parents with them was a huge release for me. I felt validated, loved, accepted and supported by everyone in the room. People would come up to me afterwords and thank me for sharing my story with them.

Maybe it comes down to that. Feeling validated, loved, accepted and supported. It's something we all need. In helping people not feel so alone, perhaps it helps them to feel a bit more validated, loved, accepted and supported.

Some of us live so much in our heads that we really think we're the only ones who feel a certain way when in reality, if you feel that way, chances are someone else does, too.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Portland

Next month some of my photographs will be hanging in the Hip Chicks Do Wine tasting room in Newberg, Oregon. It's my "In Love With Portland" series that I've been slowly piecing together over the last few years. This morning I finally sat down and wrote an "About This Series" for it because this afternoon I will be hanging the photographs at the tasting room.

I'm excited to show this series of photos because I truly love this town I call home. Also, I printed all of the photographs on hand stretched canvases (that I stretched myself) and I have to say, they look amazing! If you're in the area on May 4th, don't miss the First Friday Art Walk and be sure to stop by the Hip Chicks Do Wine tasting room at 602B E. First, Newberg, Oregon. 

In the meantime, enjoy this awesome time lapse video of Portland made by Uncage The Soul








I love Portland. So hard.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Busy, Busy, Busy

The past month or so has been incredibly busy for me. So much so, that I haven't given my writing any sort of priority. As a matter of fact, it's pretty much been last on my list and that realization makes me sad. I miss it and the difference I feel in my day-to-day without it is more than noticeable.

I'm a bit more frustrated and on edge, which makes for some not-so-good days. When I write, things start to make more sense. Stories that have been rattling around in my brain, taking up space, move out and make room for more which gets me back to the flow.

Writing is a necessary part of my life, like air and food and water.

Yes, I do have to keep remembering this. I tend to let "responsibilities" take over my life allowing them to trump the things that I need to do for myself, for my own sanity.

So, finding balance between work, photography and writing will be the next challenge to myself. Starting with a little bit of each every day. Well, on work days it'll be a little bit of writing and photography mixed with a lot of work.

What this means for you, dear readers, is more blog posts.

Also, this space may get a bit....hmmm...how should I put it...adult only/family beware, as I just might start posting more of my erotic writing. I've been hesitant in doing so but I realized the other day that I really shouldn't be. Sexuality is a natural part of human nature and it should be celebrated. So, celebrate it, I will!

Monday, April 23, 2012

Say Please

There have been so many wonderful reviews for this awesome collection of writings. I'm not sure what to add to the praise, to be honest.

I'm still in a bit of shock to be included in and surrounded by so many amazingly talented authors. Every time I've finished reading one of the stories in the book I find myself in awe of not only the writing but of how it effects me.

Each story takes me somewhere new. Places I've only touched the surface of in my mind are brought to life within the words and imagery. Well written stories, to me, add to the eroticism. Words are sexy when woven together in a beautifully written erotic story. These stories are incredibly well written making them amazingly sexy.

There's something for everyone in this book. Listen to Daddy and pick up your copy from Cleis Press. You won't be disappointed. Check out the Say Please blog for up to date tour information, as well.

Details:
$14.95 
Trade Paper 
ISBN 978-1-57344-785-0 
5 1/2 x 8, 232 pages

Description:
Say the magic word and fulfill your deepest desires for discipline and surrender, domination and submission, and the heightened sensations of BDSM play. One request opens up a fantasy world of classic dungeon scenes, bondage and restraint, floggers and spankings, sadism and masochism, very hot sex and so much more. True to form, Sexsmith queers classic gender dynamics, with a femme daddy in Alysia Angel's "Feathers Have Weight," and genderqueer bois who earn their right to flag black in Sassafras Lowrey's "Black Hanky." In "The Cruelest Kind," Kiki DeLovely's naughty narrator gets her just desserts from her butch in a back alley. D.L. King's top makes her submissive strip before an unseen audience in "A Public Spectacle." Face slapping can be a hard limit or the most delicious craving, as Rachel Kramer Bussel's protagonist finds out in "A Slap in the Face." Whether you dream of surrendering to a lover or of weilding your power, Say Please to the erotic inspiration within.
With contributed stories by Miriam Zoila PĂ©rez, Wendi Kali, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Gigi Frost, BB Rydell, Amelia Thornton, Vie La Guerre, Sassafras Lowrey, Dusty Horn, Kiki DeLovely, Elaine Miller, Shawna Elizabeth, Sossity Chiricuzio, Meridith Guy, August InFlux, Maria See, D.L. King, Anna Watson, Dilo Keith, Sinclair Sexsmith, Alysia Angel, Xan West, and Elizabeth Thorne.




Don't miss out on the blog tour either!


April 1      Say Please release party in SF
April 1 Viviane http://www.thesexcarnival.com
April 3 Rachel Kramer Bussel http://lustylady.blogspot.com
April 4 Giselle Renard http://donutsdesires.blogspot.com
April 5 Evoe Throw http://www.wholesexlife.com
April 6 Liz http://AlphaHarlot.com
April 9 Roma Mafia http://www.romamafia.com
April 9 Daniela http://www.thecsph.org
April 10 Official release date! Sinclair http://www.sugarbutch.net
April 11 Dede / deviantdyke http://deviantdyke.blogspot.com/
April 12 Helena Swann http://www.cuntext.com
April 13 Kim Herbel http://www.butchlesque.com
April 13   Say Please release party in NYC
April 14 Lily Lloyd http://theblackleatherbelt.com
April 15 Kelli Dunham http://www.kellidunham.com
April 16 Lyzanne http://sexpositive.tumblr.com/
April 17 Lula Lisbon http://www.lulalisbon.com
April 18 Ali Oh http://www.madeofwords.com
April 19 Jameson http://www.ftmbutchdude.com

April 21 Charlie Ninja http://charlieninja.tumblr.com/
April 22    Say Please release party in Boston
April 22 Meredith Guy http://meridithguy.tumblr.com
April 23 Wendi Kali http://astrangerinthisplace.blogspot.com
April 24 Lolita Wolf http://leatheryenta.com
April 25 Audrey at Babeland http://babeland.com/blog
April 26 Seth B http://smokebellyscorner.wordpress.com
April 27 Danika http://www.lesbrary.com




Friday, April 13, 2012

Reveling In It


This month has been so surreal to me. Words that I have woven together to expose a story that has played out in my head time after time are now permanently printed ink to paper, my name below the title. It is now encapsulated in an anthology edited by a writer I truly admire and included among some of the most talented writers in the business.

I am slowly awaking to this wondrous dream that I've held close to my heart for most of my 42 years on this planet and it feels incredibly amazing.

I am reveling in it.

I am also doing my best to stay present in each moment and fully enjoy this dream come true. I admit, it's been difficult to keep my negative thoughts at bay. The week before this past week I was walking around this Earth being a negative nelly, still not feeling “good enough”. I am so glad I was able to find my way past those feelings. The odds are I'll have to do it again, and again, and again but knowing that I can do it makes all the difference in the world.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

I've Been Published!


Guess what appeared in my mail box yesterday!

My contributor copies of Say Please arrived in the mail yesterday and for the first time ever I saw my name and a story I wrote in print. In an actual book. Published by a publishing house.

I'm still in shock.

I swear I've opened the book at least 100 times in an effort to convince myself that this really did happen.

I am honored to be a part of this anthology. To be surrounded by such amazing writers within the book brings a feeling that I can't even begin to describe. Most of my life I've never quite felt "good enough". Although I'm still really working on that internally, this accomplishment definitely helps with that internal work.

I am a published author.

I am a published author.

I AM A FUCKING PUBLISHED AUTHOR!

How amazing is that?!

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Say Please Virtual Book Tour!

 Don't miss out!

Check out today's blog (Evoe Throw http://www.wholesexlife.com)! There's an awesome review of my story!

April 1      Say Please release party in SF
April 1 Viviane http://www.thesexcarnival.com
April 3 Rachel Kramer Bussel http://lustylady.blogspot.com
April 4 Giselle Renard http://donutsdesires.blogspot.com
April 5 Evoe Throw http://www.wholesexlife.com
April 6 Liz http://AlphaHarlot.com
April 9 Roma Mafia http://www.romamafia.com
April 10 Official release date! Sinclair http://www.sugarbutch.net
April 11 Dede / deviantdyke http://deviantdyke.blogspot.com/
April 12 Helena Swan http://www.cuntext.com
April 13 Kim Herbel http://www.butchlesque.com
April 13   Say Please release party in NYC
April 14 Lily Lloyd http://theblackleatherbelt.com
April 16 Lyzanne http://sexpositive.tumblr.com/
April 17 Lula Lisbon http://lulalisbon.tumblr.com
April 18 Ali Oh http://www.madeofwords.com
April 19 Jameson http://www.ftmbutchdude.com
April 21 Charlie Ninja http://charlieninja.tumblr.com/
April 22    Say Please release party in Boston
April 22 Meredith Guy http://meridithguy.tumblr.com
April 23 Wendi Kali http://astrangerinthisplace.blogspot.com
April 24 Lolita Wolf http://leatheryenta.com
April 25 Audrey at Babeland http://babeland.com/blog
April 26 Seth B http://smokebellyscorner.wordpress.com
April 27 Danika http://www.lesbrary.com
April 28 DL King http://www.dlkingerotica.com
April 29 Kiki http://kikidelovely.wordpress.com
April 30 Dilo Keith http://dilokeith.wordpress.com/blog-2/
April 30 Xan West http://tgstonebutch.livejournal.com/
May 2 Say Please release party in Seattle